The other day, I caught myself thinking: is helping someone who hasn’t asked for it actually a blessing or a curse?

We often act with the best intentions – offering advice to a friend, “correcting” a colleague, or trying to “save” a loved one. But instead of a “thank you”, we are often met with irritation or coldness.

What’s the catch?

When we offer unsolicited help, we are subconsciously sending a message: “You can’t handle this yourself, and I know better.” It doesn’t sound like support; it sounds like a lecture. Why are we trying to “save” them, and from what?

In psychology, this is known as resistance. When a person feels pressured (even with the best intentions), their natural instinct is to push back. It creates friction instead of understanding. And if there’s a misunderstanding of intent, who’s to blame?

The “Retail” Example

Think about a simple trip to the store:

• Scenario A: You’re just browsing, clearing your head, and comparing prices. Suddenly, a salesperson rushes over and aggressively pushes a product on you. It’s not just annoying; it creates a negative association with the brand.
• Scenario B: You are looking for something specific, and someone helps you find it. In this case, you feel relieved and grateful.

The difference lies entirely in the request.

How to Help the Right Way

A position of strength isn’t about “saving” everyone or jumping into the fray uninvited. It’s about giving people a choice.

Instead of demanding, “Do it this way!”, try saying:

• “If you’d like, I can share how I handled this before.”
• “I’m here if you need any help.”

The Bottom Line

Help is a form of an agreement. If one side hasn’t consented, it isn’t help—it’s a violation of boundaries. This inevitably leads to a loss of negativity toward the person and, in a business context, toward the product itself.

In business, just like in life, overstepping boundaries destroys loyalty. The value of advice increases tenfold when there is a genuine demand for it.

What do you think? Should you intervene if you see someone making a mistake? Or is it better to let them walk their own path and learn from experience?

Share your thoughts in the comments below! 👇